Chapters in this section:

Barriers / Removing barriers / Your communication reputation / Improving your skills / Body language / Active listening / Challenging

Communication is at the heart of being a good teacher or lecturer. The relationships you form with staff, students, parents and governors can make all the difference to your job day to day and to your career in the longer term. Make it a priority to build and develop your communication skills - listening as well as talking.

You

In order to improve the way that you communicate both at work and in your personal life it is important to realise what things effect successful communication. The first of these things are the barriers to communication:

Barriers

• Feeling under pressure or attack.
• Feeling patronised or undermined.
• Being put down or ignored.
• Being lectured at or given unwanted advice.
• Feeling threatened.
• Feeling defensive.
• Not being given a fair chance to speak.

A number of the above barriers can occur when having a difficult conversation with your staff, an issue that we will address later in this section. By being aware of these barriers you are better able to address them when they occur and work towards removing them.

Below are some suggestions as to how this can be done:

What removes barriers?

• Respect for oneself.
• Respect for others.
• Avoid assumptions, for example how someone may be feeling about a particular situations. Rather than assume, ask them how they are feeling.
• Clarify the reasons for communicating. By doing this all people involved can make sure that you all achieve what you set out to at the beginning of the interaction.
• Give space and time. For example difficult conversation shouldn't be rushed.
• Use "I" statements. This makes people take ownership of the issues being discussed and can make it clear how you feel about something.
• Focus on facts and observable behaviours. For example people's non-verbal behaviour.

It can also be useful to ask yourself what your reputation would be. How would people describe your way of communicating?

Communication: What's your reputation?

• Are you seen as a ready critic who is quick to judge?
• Are you seen as informative?
• Do you change to suit the situation?
• Are you approachable or impatient?
• Can you keep a confidence?
• Can you show your feelings in an appropriate way?
• Do you ramble or are you decisive?
• Are you a "stamp" collector?

Stamp collector - If you don't deal with things as they occur you will end up storing them and then take it out on the most recent interaction. If you internalise problems it can lead to illness.

How can I improve my communication skills?

Once you are aware of your reputation as a communicator you can look at the ways to improve your skills. Here are a few tips:

• Asking open-ended questions is a great way to initiate communication because it shows other people that you are interested in their response.
• Take your time and know what you want to say before you start.
  
• Use clear and simple language.
• Vary your communication style according to who you are speaking to.
• Be positive and confident. Believe that what you have to say is worth listening to!
• Actively listen and repeat what the other person says - "so what you mean is….." This way, you can make sure that you get the point.
• Learn from experience! Review conversations to assess whether you got your point across clearly. Could you have done anything differently?

Is body language important?

Body language is also incredibly important to successful communication.Whether you're communicating with one person or a group, non-verbal communication - body language - is vital.

What we do, often communicates more than we actually say. A lot of non-verbal behaviour is automatic and difficult to change. However, by learning to read body language, you can make yourself more positive and approachable and simultaneously pick up clues about how others are feeling. Here are some basic tips:

• Face people when you talk to them. It shows you are interested in what they have to say.
• Try to have a relaxed posture, as it indicates confidence and enthusiasm.
• Notice facial expressions. Be aware that some people mask their emotions by not using facial expression; others exaggerate facial expression to conceal their real feelings.
• Frequent eye contact communicates interest and confidence. Avoidance communicates the opposite.

Once you have identified those barriers which are preventing you from having successful interactions, are aware of your reputation and can tune in to body language you can then look at how to be a more active listener.

Below are some quick and easy things you can do to improve your listening skills.

Active listening

• Are you seen as a ready listener with an open mind?
• Tuning in to non verbal cues.
• Getting behind the words.
• Encouraging the flow. This can be non-verbally by nodding or smiling or using encouraging works and questions.
• Staying on track. This can take the form of you paraphrasing what someone has said to you to clarify understanding.
• Feeding back the main points. This ensures that all people involved in the interaction understand the expected outcome.
• Checking your understanding.
• Closing and identifying the key action points.

All of the above hints and tips should help you to have more successful communications with your staff.

Your staff

There are particular conversations that may be difficult to address with your staff and below is some advice on how to approach these.

Communication & appropriate challenging:

• Appropriate challenging involves placing demands on people because, generally speaking, they are receiving information they don't necessarily want.
• Challenging people respectfully is both difficult and demanding.
• It frequently involves unsolicited information/feedback about some aspects of behaviour which the person may be unaware, it invariably produces discomfort.
• People often avoid challenging because they are afraid of conflict.

It is normal to feel anxious when addressing difficult issues and because of this people often avoid challenging because they are afraid of conflict.

Challenging in the sense used here is inviting the other person to look at the situation differently, especially if their view is distorted, misinformed or unrealistic.

Challenging may be appropriate when the person is/has:

• Reluctant to accept their responsibility for certain events.
• Clinging to old dysfunctional attitudes or ways of behaving.
  
• Being evasive or game playing.
• Reluctant to take on alternative or new ideas.
• Failing to understand the consequences of their behaviour.
  
• Failed to meet agreed deadlines.
• Behaving in a way which contradicts what they say.
• Refusing to acknowledge your viewpoint.

Challenging has to steer a course between too aggressive and too submissive and effective challenging involves being assertive.

By raising awareness of what is happening and supporting it by facts you can be more effective .

• Ask a direct, open question about what you sense the person is avoiding, e.g. "When, How, Why, What, Where"?
• Feedback to the person on how they are impacting on others by their attitude or behaviour.
• Educative feedback - advise the person on how to get help and support.
• Change focus from "what?" to "how?" from "then and there" to "here and now", from "I can't" to "I choose not to".
• Affirm all the positive qualities the other person possesses.